This is probably why I am writing at 01:30.
I had an interesting situation with Miss C-Jaz as we were winding down, getting ready for bedtime, and I really wasn't quite sure what I was doing, but in hindsight, I was doing just fine. It lasted for about 15 minutes perhaps.
I was putting away some clothing, and she was walking around, doin' her thang, talking, singing, asking questions like, "Mommy, what do-in?" We had just hung some of her clothes on the Ikea drying rack, on which she really did hang some of her little itty bitty faceclothes, and after which she stated...
"Mommy! Yay! Nana did it!
'Yook', I hung it.
Mommy, don't touch it!"
At some point, she had dropped her bottle. I picked it up, moved it, then she picked it up and dropped it, again. I asked her to pick it up and said we don't drop things because we should take care of what we have. (This is probably where I should've looked directly into her eyes at her eye level.) She said, "No, Mommy! You get it."
This is where I searched the files in my mind for Supernanny techniques because what do I do? I want Miss C-Jaz to learn to appreciate what we're fortunate enough to have. Everything she says sounds cute. She didn't sound condascending, just cute, but if I picked up the bottle after she demanded I do, this would lead to a world of issues down the road, right?
I ignored the bottle for a bit, and as I continued to ask her to pick it up, her refusals continued, then came the pouting, quickly leading to crying and real tears. This has happened a couple times before, and I usually just pick up the bottle and move on. This time, she purposely dropped the bottle then kicked it so it lay under the drying rack.
While she cried and complained telling me to go get it, I sat on the bed.
I filed a nail.
I skimmed my book.
I put away some clothes.
There were moments she stopped crying to ask me, "What 'dat?" Then, her crying and pouting ensued, still cute as heck nonetheless. I 'stayed true' though (The Big Bang Theory). I didn't pick up the bottle. I didn't ignore her, but I didn't engage in conversation with her.
Daddy came up to check in on us. Then, while I helped him dig for a computer cable in our stored luggages, Miss C-Jaz was starting to settle. As Daddy left the room, as I decided whether to sit, to file, or to skim, Miss C-Jaz, with Bo tucked under one arm, bent down by the drying rack. In a calm voice she asked herself aloud, "Where is it?" She squatted, squished herself under the rack, retreived the bottle, bumped her head on her way out, then handed me the bottle.
In my shock and elation, all I could say was, "Thank you!" She didn't drop the bottle again, at least not this night. I probably should've made sure she apologized, but I was just so dumbfounded.
I didn't quite know what to think. I was shocked that my attempt at a Supernanny technique resulted in what seemed like success. Sure, maybe it seemed like I won, but I hope that what she really learned was to 'do exactly what Mommy says'! Just kidding!!! I hope she realized that she should care for what she has by not drop kicking her bottle and that she can't expect me to clean up or pick up what she would be capable of doing.
All I know is that once she handed me the bottle, I couldn't have been more proud of her that she's growing up conscientious and with a strong-willed mind of her own. I couldn't also help but be saddened at the thought that my baby is growing up!!!
This escapade may have lasted for a short amount of 'real time' though it seemed like forever, and I'm sure the technique could've/should've been different, but I persevered and followed what felt right for her. That's probably the teacher in me to modify, but thank goodness for Supernanny episodes and families that needed her help!
